And Now You Want A Platform???

By Lyle R. Hill

This past March I publically announced, right here in this very prestigious publication, that I was beginning an exploratory campaign to see if there was enough support for me to enter the 2020 presidential race (see page 104 in the March 2019 issue of USGlass magazine). I did this because I care about our country, and as long as there were already about two dozen people in the race … and most of them no one has ever heard of … I felt there was little to lose and perhaps much to gain. Being from Chicago, I know exactly
how profitable “public service” can be. As you may recall, I encouraged readers to send me cash as a sign of their support. To my great surprise, some actually did.

And while they didn’t send as much as I would have hoped, some indicated that they would be more supportive if I told them what my platform would be. I don’t fully understand this because it doesn’t appear to me that many of the other candidates have a real platform … other than to just give money away in some fashion … but I understand their concerns. So, I am releasing what will be the initial three planks of my platform. More planks will roll out in proportion to how much additional money rolls in.

Plank #1: As president, I would immediately push for what I am going to call the Disney Deal. It will work like this: when the youngest child in any family in America reaches the age of 10, that child and his or her immediate family will be provided with one week’s vacation at Disney World in Florida (including lodging, travel, food and all other expenses) paid for by the government. No one in the family would be allowed to bring or use any electronic device during this week. As you may have heard, Disney World is advertised to be the happiest place on earth and I believe every kid should have at least one week of happiness in their lifetime. Forget free college and healthcare and all that other stuff being promised that we could never afford. A week at Disney is not only affordable (you’ll
soon read how), but after a kid has had a week there, they will be motivated to go out and work hard so one day they can go back or go to some other fun place that costs money. And let’s admit it, my fellow Americans, do our kids need positive motivation or not? Such an occurrence would also build family unity and this, too, is something I think is needed today.

Plank #2: Now I know what some of you are saying. You’re murmuring that I’m just like all those other candidates wanting to “buy” their way into office by giving something away, but not having any idea as to how to pay for it. Well my friends, this is not the case at all. Plank number two is this: you can’t give anything new away unless you cut expenses somewhere else to pay for it. Contrary to what our political leaders have come to believe, the taxpayers in this country do not have an endless supply of money to give to the government for the purpose of spending it on unnecessary or foolish programs. I propose that if we add a buck for a new program, we take away a buck from an existing program. No exceptions. So how do we pay for plank number one you may ask? Please read plank number three for the answer.

Plank #3: I’ll fix the U.S. Postal Service (USPS). I have addressed this in the past and now, as president, I would have the authority (I think) to fix this problem. Last year, depending on which report you read and believe, the USPS lost at least $8 billion … maybe more. At that pace, while you have been reading this article, the USPS lost at least $30,000 and maybe more. There are currently two presidential candidates who have proposed using the USPS locations as banking type institutions for those who can’t
or won’t use traditional banks. They want to expand other governmental services to USPS locations as well. Can you imagine what this would cost us in the long run? Has the government ever run anything efficiently or effectively? I propose that we stop the bleeding at the post offices and give the money to my Disney Plan. We could accomplish this by cutting mail delivery to three times a week. There is absolutely no need for mail delivery six times a week. We would not lay anyone off or reduce their weekly pay,
but simply would not replace them when they retire. Over time, we would cut labor costs in half and could do the same for fleet and other variable costs. I would also bring in whatever assistance was needed to get the USPS operating in a professional and courteous manner, even if it meant privatizing the whole mess. Our USPS, like many other governmental agencies, is a disgrace.

So I say to you doubters, and particularly to those of you who have not sent me any money yet (remember, cash only), the time for action is NOW. Here is your chance to join my RUTS (Return Us To Sanity) movement. And I thank you very much!

Lyle R. Hill is the managing director of Keytech North America, a company providing research and technical services for the glass and metal industry. He also serves as president of Glass.com®, an information portal and job generation company for the glass industry. Hill has more than 40 years’ experience in the glass and metal industry and can be reached at lhill@glass.com.

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